Mischief Managed ϟ Marauder Era Challenge
→ Day 02 - Favorite duo/friendship
Sirius Black & James Potter
just because you’re not there to see it, does not mean it doesn’t exist
I’m sorry but is that a freaking SLENDERMAN????
ALL ABOARD THE NOPE TRAIN.
I THUGH THIS WAS A STICK BUG
people are talking about the year of luigi ending
y o u c a n ’ t k i l l a g o d
i fucking called this. I FUCKING CALLED THIS
Smart ideas for Smarter cities
IBM’s marketing team shitting all over competition
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’
I wonder why I cannot be both.
He kisses me
My college theater professor once told me
that despite my talent,
I would never be cast as a romantic lead.
We do plays that involve singing animals
and children with the ability to fly,
but apparently no one
has enough willing suspension of disbelief
to go with anyone loving a fat girl.
I daydream regularly
about fucking my boyfriend vigorously on his front lawn.
On the mornings I do not feel pretty,
while he is still asleep,
I sit on the floor and check the pockets of his skinny jeans for motive,
for a punchline,
for other girls’ phone numbers.
When we hold hands in public,
I wonder if he notices the looks —
like he is handling a parade balloon on a crowded sidewalk;
if he notices that my hands are now made of rope.
Dear Cosmo: Fuck you.
I will not take sex tips from you
on how to please a man you think I do not deserve.
He tells me he loves me with the lights on.
I can cup his hip bone in my hand,
feel his ribs without pressing very hard at all.
He does not believe me when I tell him he is beautiful.
Sometimes I fear the day he does will be the day he leaves.
The cute hipster girl at the coffee shop
assumes we are just friends
and flirts over the counter.
I spend the next two weeks
mentally replacing myself with her
in all of our photographs.
When I admit this to him
we spend the evening taking new photos together.
He will not let me delete a single one of them.
The phrase “Big girls need love too” can die in a fire.
Fucking me does not require an asterisk.
Loving me is not a fetish.
Finding me beautiful is not a novelty.
I am not a fucking novelty.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says, ‘No. You are so much more’,
and kisses me
Compiled all of the boy and his duck pictures with their original sourcing in what I hope is chronological order.
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
THERE HE IS, WHAT A GEM AND LOOK AT THAT FUCKING DUCKLING AH I CAN’T
DUCK UPDATE: IT HAS IMPRINTED AND THINKS THIS BOY IS IT’S MOMMY. OMG
DUCK UPDATE: TODAY WE HAD A FIRE DRILL AND HE CARRIED THE DUCKY OUTSIDE WITH HIM AND CRADLED IT PROTECTIVELY AND MOTHERLY INSTINCTS ARE FUCKING ADORABLE
I know the duck boy and he and his duck are inseparable. An indestructible bond to say the least.
Actual Kids Story: A Boy and His Duck
hey look i can smile